Friday, March 26, 2010

Things that Bug Me

~ Those little stick figure characters on the back on mini vans.
~ People who drive the speed limit or less in the left lane
~ Unfinished bottles of wine
~ Laziness
~ Rudeness

That's all. Happy FRIDAY!!!!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


Really? This is the epitome of what is wrong in America. A lady decides to get knocked up artificially inseminated with a random sperm donor, and produces eight children at once. She gets hand out, after hand out including 24-hour child care paid for by Dr. Phil. Which, she then later insisted they leave her house because she "didn't want the children to be confused who their mother was." Really? Pretty sure they are going to be confused their whole life. You paid money to look like Angelina Jolie and definitely one-upped her in the kid department. At least Angie adopted and didn't ruin her uterus for life.

Now, Octomom probably spent the money she earned with her talents clown car vagina spawn, and now doesn't have the money to pay a balloon payment of $450k? Why can't you get a normal loan like a normal person. You know, a 30-year fixed? Or maybe rent if you can't afford a house. Chances are someone would donate a house to you, or that is what you hoped right?

It bothers me that she is asking Dr. Phil and Oprah to bail her out. Like it's their fault she is retarded and can't manage her finances? Didn't she do a photo shoot showing her non-disgusting stomach (sarcasm?) in a bikini? Use some of that money. Or you could do a reality show. It worked out really well for Jon and Kate. (See what I'm doing here?)

Good luck Octomom, and I hope you can pull it together for those kids. It would be horrible to see you building a fort out of them for shelter.

Sleeping Beauty

So apparently, cotton pillowcases suck out the moisture of your face while you sleep. Silk pillowcases are much more skin friendly, and are more gentle on your hair. Well, for those of us girls who are blessed with not having to wash everyday.

Also, your skin starts to repair at 10pm, so get your makeup off and moisturize before then. Especially those of us who stay up a teensy bit later.

Sooooo, get some silk pillowcases and get your makeup off before 10pm and you'll have even more beautiful skin than you already have. Who knew? You glow girl.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

New Blog!

So I decided to start a weight loss blog. I didn't want to fill up this blog with my woes, trials and tribulations with my weight. Sooooo, if you're interested, here is the link:

Weight Loss Adventures of Mrs. Awesome

Chelsea Chelsea, Bang Bang

I got Chelsea Handler's new book today. At Costco. For $14. In her famous words, "Suck it" CH on your retail price of $24.99. I will be enjoying your book at a discounted rate thankyouverymuch.

p.s. Watch her show. 11pm on E!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Italian Soup

So it may not be as pretty as in the post before, but it sure looks yummy! And for '0' points, imma eat me some soup!

Really?! With Mrs. Awesome

Really, Kesha? You think Britney is a sell out for not singing ALL of her songs at concerts? Really? You claim, "It's treating people as if they are too stupid to realize you are not actually singing." Really?! Who can dance like Britney AND sound perfect? If  people wanted to hear you JUST sing they'd buy your album, er, songs, on iTunes. Really, Kesha? You couldn't even do a poor man's impression of the famous "Bye Bye Bye" move without looking like a hot mess.

Well, at least you know you can't sing as you said perfectly yourself..."When I am singing, I may sound s--t sometimes, but at least you'll know I'm singing." Yep we sure do. Aaaaaaand it sucks. Stick to playing your song on the radio.

Oh, just in case you didn't know, Britney can, a) dance, b) put on an amazing show, c) become a household name without a symbol or eye patches.

For my friends who don't watch American Idol, here is her performance. I think you'll agree. And if you don't well, it's my blog and I do and say what I want. :)

**For some reason it's not letting me embed the video. Grrrr. Here is the link**

Kesha's Train Wreck Performance

Kesha slams Brit?

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

"Zero Point" Soups Comin' Right Up!

On my new adventure we call, Weight Watchers, you try and maximize your food v. point intake. Basically, you want to get as much food for the points. And save those for ones you REALLY want. Like, 1-point-per-thin-mint-cookies. Mmmmm, totally worth it.

I really love Italian soup, so I'm going to try this recipe. If it's good I'll post the recipe for you all to try. It's a "free" 1-cup serving to help fill you up before meals, or even an evening snack if you're still hungry. Or dinner if you went crazy at the office potluck. Don't lie, you know what I'm talking about.

I'm also going to try the "Zero Point" butternut squash soup. Sounds yummy AND filling. Bon Apetit!

Awesome. That's all.

6 Signs You're in a Healthy Relationship

I found this article on Yahoo! today and thought it was so true. I'm so fortunate to have such wonderful friends and family. Well, some you choose, some you don't. But overall, we form the relationships we want to have. Make sure yours are worth having...

Loyalty: Whether it's in friendships or in family, loyalty is truly important to maintain a healthy relationship. All of us are guilty, at one time or another, of making mistakes, having ups and downs, and even displaying some behavior that we may not always be proud of. When we find friends or loved ones who can forgive us and stand by us…even during our worst moments…we should be especially grateful. That said, loyalty should never be taken for granted and we should always be deeply appreciative when it comes our way.

Respect: I once knew an individual who was very opinionated about political topics. She would talk down to people who disagreed with her and would be very disrespectful. Not only did she make people feel stomped on, but she left many disinterested in friendship. Treating others with kindness and the respect they deserve is important in gaining the respect that WE desire. It never feels good to be taken for granted, judged or used and it doesn’t feel good to be talked down to or treated rudely or inappropriately. There will be times that we may not always have full agreement with our friends or loved ones, but respecting them along the way is a must.

Unconditionally There: There is nothing worse than having someone always resurface in your life when they are in need, are looking for something or need a favor. In a culture of “you scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours,” it is somewhat rare to find those “who just scratch your back,” period. Finding individuals who want you in their lives just because…and not because they want something in return is refreshing and worth holding on to. Those who are generous of heart are to be treasured!

Trustworthy: I once worked with a woman who, within my first week on the job, felt the need to tell me all of the intimate details of the various extra-marital affairs that had occurred with the management of the firm. She was supposedly friends with these people and I have no doubt, was told this information in the most strictest of confidences. How she felt it was appropriate to divulge this information to a new-hire like me, I still have no idea. But, it was her nature to gossip about everyone and everything. If you share something in confidence, you should be able to trust that the information will remain that way.

A Genuine Sounding Board: Taking a genuine interest in what others have to say and really listening to someone is important in developing solid relationships. Letting go of the “me, me, me” and focusing on the other person not only makes the other person feel valued and appreciated, but they feel that they can really talk to someone who cares. Those who take the time to really listen to our thoughts and feelings, and then help us work through difficult times and situations, share our lives at a much deeper level than those who don’t. These are individuals worth hanging on to.

Dependability: I had a friend who frequently would RSVP to small gatherings and then would never show. They never explained…never brought it up…and never apologized. Although this example is somewhat trivial, it still makes the point. Obviously there are times when things come up that prevent individuals from following through on what they promise, but if a friend, co-worker or family member perpetually drops the ball, they may be sending you a message. If a friend says they are going to do something or be somewhere, you should be able to count on them. And, in reciprocation, they you.

Dear Blogger, It's Me, Mrs. Awesome.

Dear Blogger,

It's Me, Mrs. Awesome. I would like the ability to re-post things from other people's blogs. Please make it happen. My Tumblr friends can do it.

Mrs. Awesome

Sunday, March 14, 2010

St. Patrick's Day 2011

Last night was the annual St. Patrick's Day Pub Crawl. My outfit was waaaay less than mediocre because, well to be honest, nothing fits right now. I settled on an olive green dress from TJ Maxx for $8.99. Next year, maybe something more like this.

And also, I think Sacramento should dye the river like this. Makes it much more festive. And awesome.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

If she only had a high paying reality show...

Wow. She DOES have a brain. Who knew? She gave the axe to her DB husband. I bet her dogs would be better managers. They have less facial hair, that's for sure. Although, hiring a psychic may not be the beeeessst choice, but it's better than "creepy flesh colored beard" running her life.

Pratt, who has managed the couple since the day they met nearly five years ago - when Montag was 19 years old - is being replaced with a Malibu-based psychic named Aiden Chase, the reality star tells PEOPLE.
"After the incredible experiences I have had healing my life and truly connecting to my dreams with healer intuitive Aiden Chase, I have officially asked him to become my manager," Montag says. "Having an intuitive psychic leading my team gives me an edge no one else has."

"No longer is my husband the face of my business or managing my career," she adds. "I am going to have Aiden Chase help manage my new life and career in a very different and positive way with light and love. The time for change is now. Never mix business and pleasure. We are no longer Speidi but Spencer and Heidi."

This is also before all of her surgeries. Ok, probably not the nose job, but still think she looks cute.

I think she looks super sweet in this pic. It looks like it was from the first season of the hills. She had issues of not being cute, but all she needed was an eyebrow wax, some fake eyelashes and Ken Paves. No big. :)

Sunday, March 7, 2010

The Second Week

Sooooo, the second week weigh in didn't go as I'd hoped. Don't get me wrong, it's not horrible but not what I was expecting. I gained .4 of a pound so not an ENTIRE pound, but it's also not a loss. I re-evaluated my eating and activity levels and know what I need to do. Lets hope week 3 goes well!

Cruising in Style!!!

My bike is on the way! My bike is on the way! Mr. Awesome and I have been wanting cruisers forever! The flat area and golf cart trails around here are perfect for it. All I need now is a basket for the big man, and we're set. Mr. Awesome of course got the matching blue one. Can't wait!

Sleepless in Seattle?

I'm going to Seattle for 3 days, and I hope I'm not going to be sleepless there. I heart sleep. I looked into it and the hotel has an AMAZING gym and is walking distance to the mall. AND, there is a Red Mango yogurt shop nearby. Sounds like a great trip already!

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Mrs. Awesome Movie Reviews

So when it's rainy and gloomy out, there is nothing better than cuddling up with your Snuggie, puppy and fire while watching a good movie.

Here are a few movies I've watched recently and my oh-so-awesome review...

Super Awesome!
Kinda Awesome
NOT Awesome

 Inglorious Basterds
Rating: Super Awesome!
People you would know: Brad Pitt, B.J. Novak, intern from "The Office" and the Jewish Guy who's on TMZ a lot
Premise: Fed up with the Nazi and Hitler run Germany, a group of rugged guys, led by Mr. Pitt, trick the Nazi's and kill them off one by one. It's pretty gory but the filming, acting and story line make it a great movie! I'm a girl and I really enjoyed it. Maybe not a date night movie, but definitely a good pick.

The Informant!
Rating: Kinda Awesome
People you would know: Matt Damon, Joel McHale from The Soup
Premise: The only thing that gave this move a 'Kinda Awesome' rating is Matt and Joel being in it. Mr. Damon doesn't even look like himself thanks to a mustache and about 30 extra pounds he packed on for the role. Basically Damon is hoping to move up the corporate ladder so he makes up ridiculous stories about his company and works with the FBI trying to take them down. This is also based on a true story which makes it "Kinda Awesome" also. He travels around the world meeting with all of these high powered execs and dodges any sort of truth. It's a serious movie, but they do random things to make it funny. Like play upbeat music during serious times, and hearing him think to himself during important meetings. The boys would probably like it more than the girls.

Law Abiding Citizen
Rating: Super Awesome!
People you would know: Jamie Foxx, Gerard Butler
Premise: If you cover your eyes for the first 20 minutes of the movie you're good to go. I'm not joking; you'll thank me later. Gerard Butler takes the law in his own hands to get revenge on the justice system. There is a lot of violence and blood, but if you look past it, the message of the movie is actually pretty good. I never knew how good of an actor Jamie Foxx was until I saw him in this. I can totally understand Kirstie Alley's obession with him. :)

Miss March
Rating: NOT Awesome
People you would know: Hugh Hefner, The Warehouse guy from The Office, a Yorkie
Premise: A guy wakes up from a four year coma and searches for his high school sweetheart who is now Miss March. DO NOT RENT THIS! It's awful. So awful in fact, here's the ending. He finds his old girlfriend at the Playboy Mansion and she is still in love with him. Blah Blah. Ok, maybe there were a couple funny parts, like the best friend stabbing his girlfriend in the face with a fork, and a famous rapper, Horsedick.MPEG that was born without man parts. Other than that, I'm pretty sure I lost a few brain cells from watching this.

Wine and Book Club!

One of my goals for 2010 was to start a book club with my friends. Check! Our first meeting will be March 25th and the first book is L.A. Candy, by Lauren Conrad. This is a total "chick lit" book club, so no Kite Runner, or A Million Little Pieces here. This is straight girly girl reading.

So excited and can't wait to start reading!

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Snooki was a Girl Scout?

Thank you MTV for bringing Jersey Shore into my life. It truly is a fabulous train wreck that makes me complete.

Now, Snooki is pretty awesome. She took a hit to the face, isn't afraid to take her shirt off in the hot tub and knows exactly what she is looking for in a man. You know, a "juiced up guido." Plus, she is always prepared in case her signature "pouf" somehow isn't so poufy anymore. She must have been a girl scout. Take note girls, always have an extra bright white hair clip circa 1980 ready and available AT ALL TIMES.